Real American Wrestleblog

This blog predates Jack Swagger's gimmick shift by a year. I named it after Hulk Hogan's entrance theme.

Posts Tagged ‘Anaconda Vice

Five Things to Take Away from Extreme Rules 2013

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Folks, I was actually there for the show, so I have a slightly different perspective than the viewers at home, so keep that in mind.  I’m sure all of you who bought the Pay Per View or managed to watch it through other, more dubious means had a better view of most of the action, but sitting up in the stands, I might have caught some things that the cameras missed, for example, the first takeaway I got from the night.

1) Mark Henry sells harder and better than the Big Show, or at least he did last night.  What really sold me on this was the two similar spots they did where they got pulled or pushed into the ring post.  With Henry facing off against Sheamus in the Strap Match, at one point they took the fight out of the ring, but exited out different sides, leaving a ring post in between them.  Sheamus then used the strap to pull Henry into the ring post and when Henry through himself into the spot and made contact, the ring post moved violently and I almost thought they could break it off the side of the ring if they did that spot just one more time.  But they went back in the ring and completed the match.  Then, three matches later, Big Show takes on Randy Orton in an Extreme Rules Match and they too take the fight out to the floor and Big Show swats a ladder away from Orton and hoists Orton up like he’s going to use him for a battering ram and slam him into that same ring post that Henry collided with.  However, Orton counters and gets down behind Big Show and shoves him into that ring post and low and behold, nothing happens.  The ring post didn’t shake at all, which after what Henry did during his spot led me to believe that Big Show took it easy on himself while Henry went full bore.

2) Brock Lesnar vs. Triple H should not have been the closing match of the night.  I understand why they thought it had to close the show, since it was supposedly going to be the third and deciding match of their rivalry and thus should prove to be the best match between them, but it wasn’t.  On top of that, after the St. Louis crowd violently cheered on the hometown hero Randy Orton against Big Show and then going through the self-imposed obligation of showing all the kids in attendance who the boss is during the “Let’s Go Cena – CENA SUCKS,” chants, the crowd was pretty well out of it.  Coupled with the fact that the match didn’t end cleanly immediately after the only WWE / World Title match of the night didn’t have a winner and everybody leaves feeling slighted.  I don’t even think people cared who won, it just would have been nice to see a clear winner and a clear loser.  By the way, as my brother pointed out about the finish of that match was Paul Heyman was doing a sell job and then he pops up to low blow HHH and then goes right back to doing his cell job and acts like he’s unconscious up until Lesnar exits the cage and then reaches in and drags Heyman out by the leg.  What exactly was the point in that?  That was horrible planning on Heyman’s part.  Once you pop up and hit the low blow and don’t get touched again, how do you go back to being knocked out?  I thought Paul Heyman was smarter than that.

3) The Shield might not actually be a cohesive unit for much longer.  We’ve seen it before with pretty much every heel group that’s been cut from the same cloth as The Shield.  The Nexus, the Corre, Evolution, the nWo – once the members start winning titles, jealousy starts to set in and it becomes a pissing match over who is better.  That’s pretty much the way all of these things end and the beginning of the end usually comes once one or all of the members start winning titles.  As we saw with Evolution and the nWo, that can lead to a series of decent rivalries and play out for a long time, or as we saw with the Corre, it can completely break up the group in pretty much no time flat.

4) Dean Ambrose and Kofi Kingston put on a pretty sloppy match while Chris Jericho vs. Fandango seemed pretty sound.  During the United States Title Match, it seemed to me that Ambrose was having quite a bit of trouble keeping pace with Kofi, which led to Ambrose looking pretty stupid by having to hurry at the last second to get into place to take some of Kofi’s moves.  And there was also the botch where Kofi tried to jump over Ambrose, but Ambrose didn’t get out of the way quick enough and Kofi kicked him in the head accidentally, which they no sold and moved on.  Conversely, Jericho vs. Fandango didn’t seem to have any slip ups at all, but then again Jericho is amazing and Fandango doesn’t do any moves that can really be screwed up except for usually landing wrong on his opponents heads.  His move set strikes me as overly basic, which sometimes when you’re still just getting the hang of the business, it’s better to K.I.S.S. (Keep it Simple, Stupid).  So there really wasn’t any opportunity I saw for him to really screw up the match other than if he had taken Jericho’s flying crossbody at the start of the match wrong and dropped him on the floor kind of like The Miz did to R-Truth last year that got him in hot water.  So, Fandango can at least take other people’s high spots without screwing up, which is more than can be said for The Miz or Sim Snuka / Deuce.  However, I’d rather watch a match like what Ambrose and Kingston put on that is slightly sloppy because at least they were taking some risks to try to put together a better match even if they couldn’t get the timing right.

5) HHH’s Sharpshooter is almost as bad as The Rock’s.  Anybody that is a part of the fan group I comment in on facebook knows that I’m pretty hard on The Rock for his extremely bad version of the Sharpshooter.  Well, Triple H brought it out for the cage match against Brock Lesnar last night and it ended up being every bit as bad as the version utilized by The Rock.  However, it didn’t start out that way.  It looked like HHH actually did a semi-decent job of applying the move at the start and had a decent version locked in, but Lesnar fought to stretch himself out to lessen the pressure because he apparently couldn’t take it, but that wasn’t supposed to be the finish of the match, so the move just ended up looking really bad by the time Lesnar drug himself almost all the way down to the mat instead of letting HHH hold him up and selling the hold.  So, I put most of the blame for HHH’s version on Lesnar not cooperating, unlike when Rock just plain puts the hold on wrong from the start.  Chris Benoit is the only one who has come close to doing the move correctly since Owen and Bret Hart’s time, and Bret gives him credit for it, but always points out that it isn’t right any time I read anything where he’s asked about it.  In this day and age though, nobody cares about doing the submissions correctly and making it look good (with the exception of Daniel Bryan’s Crossface No Lock and Punk’s occasional Anaconda Vise).  Pretty much the only time Jericho gets to put in a decent looking Walls of Jericho any more is when he’s wrestling the human gumby known as Kofi Kingston.  Maybe it’s just that wrestlers are softer now than they were ten years ago or maybe they just don’t care about the technical wrestling side of things as much, but something has to be done to reverse the trend of horribly applied submission locks.

Over the Limit Preview – Expect the Unexpected?

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We are just over four hours away from the WWE Pay Per View Over the Limit from Raleigh, North Carolina, tonight and as things currently stand, we are only aware of what a handful of the matches are going to be.  That is just one of the reasons why we should prepare to be surprised by what transpires tonight.

In the Main Event, John Laurinaitis must fight John Cena one-on-one with No Countouts and No Disqualifications and if Laurinaitis does not beat John Cena, he will be “terminated”.  And despite there being No Disqualifications, the WWE Board of Directors has ruled that any superstar interfering on GM Johnny’s behalf will be “terminated” as well.  You would think this means certain victory for Cena, right?  Don’t be so quick to write the General Manager off.

Let’s not forget that this is the same guy that used Kevin Nash last summer to push Triple H’s buttons and get the Board of Directors to put him in charge of the day-to-day operations of Raw in the first place.  John Laurinaitis is most definitely a coward and a blowhard, but he is also a manipulative bastard.  Expect for somebody not currently on the roster to help GM Johnny keep his job by beating Cena tonight.  If somebody not on the roster helps Johnny beat Cena, they don’t have a job to lose and thus have nothing to fear from the Board of Directors.  Of course, GM Johnny would then undoubtedly reward his savior with a fresh contract.

There are three possible names that come to mind that we might expect to come to Johnny’s aid.

The first name is Brock Lesnar.  Lesnar “quit” the WWE a few weeks back, but nobody is buying it.  We all know that’s kayfabe.  The question is whether this is going to be the moment for us to find out for certain that Lesnar has not left the WWE.  It would certainly make sense since Cena survived Lesnar’s beating at Extreme Rules and beat Lesnar in the only match he’s had in eight years.  That’s not something I can see Lesnar letting stand.  He’ll be in the ring with Cena again at some point before his time with the WWE is once again over.

The second name is the Big Show, and I know what you’re thinking – why would Big Show help Johnny after he was fired and humiliated on Raw this week?  If it came down to it, wouldn’t you help somebody you hated beat John Cena if you had it in your power to do so and it meant the difference between whether or not you got your job back?  Big Show just might.

The last name that comes to mind is Batista.  Rumors have been swirling since Wrestlemania that Batista was ready to come back to WWE and I’m sure Batista still believes he has some unfinished business with John Cena after their brutal rivalry two years ago that ended with John Cena hitting Batista with an Attitude Adjustment off of a car at Over the Limit 2010.

Any of the three are possible and just maybe we’ll get lucky and everybody will leave GM Johnny to suffer the fate he’s made for himself by being “The Undisputed King of Douchebags”.  And just maybe something unexpected will happen and completely blindside us, but if any of the three gentlemen in the above paragraphs turns out to be Laurinaitis’ savior, I won’t be the only one to have seen it coming.  I’m predicting that Laurinaitis wins with outside help, but it goes against what I feel is best for the product, which is getting GM Johnny off the air and keeping him there.

In the two World title matches, really anything could happen, but I think at least one of the titles is going to be changing hands tonight and I think it’ll be in the Fatal 4-Way with Alberto Del Rio crowned as the new champion.  And while I could easily see Daniel Bryan getting the biggest win of his career and becoming WWE Champion, I’m predicting that CM Punk’s six-month title reign will continue – at least for the time being.

In the World Tag Team title match, it’s tough to tell what’s coming.  Dolph Ziggler and Jack Swagger have been in contention for the Tag Team Titles since last fall, but they were never able to wrestle the titles away from Kofi Kingston and Evan Bourne.  However, Air Boom is no more and perhaps Kingston and Truth will not prove to be as strong of a union for Vickie’s boys to overcome.  I’m predicting that

And in the Diva’s title match, Layla defends against Beth Phoenix and Layla is definitely outsized and I believe Beth is certainly a better wrestler, but Layla of course has a fighting chance and she did just capture the title in her return last month at Extreme Rules.  This seems like a coin toss to me, but I’m going to pick Layla to retain.

There is also the pre-show match-up between Zack Ryder and Kane that will be broadcast on YouTube and perhaps being on YouTube will give the self-proclaimed “Internet Champion” some kind of home field advantage for an upset victory, but I wouldn’t count on it.  I’m going to give the nod to the Big Red Machine, who continues to be one of the best and most underrated performers on the roster.

Those are the six matches that we know of, but that certainly is not going to be the entire card.  I expect some possible continuation of the war of words between Intercontinental Champion Cody Rhodes and United States Champion Santino Marella on Smackdown this week.  Perhaps we’ll see some sort of Champion vs. Champion match with Rhodes seeking vengeance after Marella shocked Rhodes with a roll-up victory on Friday.  We’re also likely to see one or two squash matches featuring the likes of Brodus Clay, Ryback, Lord Tensai or Antonio Cessaro.  But this is the WWE and anything can happen.  There is definitely some space on the show tonight for all of us to be surprised in one way or another.

Written by I Am a Real American

May 20, 2012 at 2:48 pm

Posted in Alberto Del Rio, Batista, Beth Phoenix, Big Show, Brock Lesnar, Brodus Clay, Cena vs. Laurinaitis, Chris Jericho, CM Punk, CM Punk vs. Daniel Bryan, Cody Rhodes, Daniel Bryan, Dolph Ziggler, Extreme Rules, Fatal 4-Way, Friday Night Smackdown, Intercontinental Championship, Jack Swagger, John Cena, John Laurenaitis, Kane, Kevin Nash, Kofi Kingston, Layla El, Lord Tensai, Monday Night Raw, Over the Limit, Pro Wrestling, R-Truth, Randy Orton, Santino Marella, Sheamus, United States Championship, Vickie Guerrero, World Heavyweight Championship, Wrestlemania, WWE, WWE Championship, WWE Tag Team Championship, YouTube, Zack Ryder

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Chris Jericho: Does Lite Brite Cause Impotence?

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Okay, so at the beginning of the year, Chris Jericho made his triumphant return to the WWE.  Everybody was super excited.  We got his usual cryptic vignettes announcing a big return and because he’s done it twice in the past, everybody knew with absolute certainty that it would be Jericho.  Which, that’s still great – everybody was super excited.

Then the trouble started.

Jericho spent weeks without saying anything, parading around the ring like a dufus in what CM Punk so rightly dubbed a “stupid lite brite jacket”, and just wasting air time in general.  Then, everybody gets what they think is a big payoff when on the final Monday Night Raw before the Royal Rumble, he breaks his silence with one simple sentence.

“This Sunday at the Royal Rumble will be the end of the world as you know it.”

Great, so Jericho is going to shock everybody at the Royal Rumble and do something outstanding, right?  Guess again.  Jericho puts up a valiant effort, but in the end is Brogue Kicked out of the Rumble by Sheamus.  And it was a great final two for the Royal Rumble, the best since Shawn Michaels and the Undertaker tore the house down at the 2007 Royal Rumble.  However, Y2J had still not won anything since his return and apart from the Rumble, he had only wrestled a couple of times in tag matches that he walked out on without executing so much as a wrist lock.  That’s the first month of his career since his latest big return with absolutely nothing accomplished.

Move forward on the road to Wrestlemania XXVIII and Jericho finally picks up a victory over Kofi Kingston on Monday Night Raw.  Could he possibly be getting back on track?  Could he possibly be starting to once again back up his claims that he is the best in the world at what he does?  Think again because we move forward to the Elimination Chamber and while Jericho doesn’t get beat, he gets knocked out of the chamber by a kick to the back of the head and can’t return to the match.  He is once again denied any real credibility since his return to the WWE in January.

From there, Jericho would go on to win a ten man Battle Royal and earn the right to challenge CM Punk for the WWE Championship at Wrestlemania XXVIII.  Great for Jericho, now he’s on the right track, right?  He’s got the ball rolling in the right direction, right?  Wrong.  Aside from yet another stray victory over Kofi Kingston on the last Smackdown before Wrestlemania, Jericho still didn’t win anything on his own.  Jericho did add a lot of heat to his rivalry against Punk with his claims that Punk’s father was a drunk, his sister was a substance abuser and Punk himself was born out of wedlock and thus the legal definition of a bastard.  He certainly showed that he hadn’t lost his ability to get under his opponent’s skin and deliver heated and shocking moments on the microphone.  However, all of that did nothing to reestablish the credibility of his tremendous wrestling prowess.

Then we get to Wrestlemania XXVIII and the stipulation is added that Jericho can win the title if Punk succumbs to his rage and gets disqualified.  Jericho can’t lose, right?  If that’s what you’re thinking, you haven’t been paying very close attention to the theme thus far.  Jericho then goes out and puts on a technical wrestling classic against Punk.  It was full full of great counter wrestling, reversals of fortune and false finishes.  Despite connecting with a Codebreaker and locking in the Walls of Jericho on multiple occasions, CM Punk managed to survive and keep the WWE Championship after forcing Jericho to submit to the Anaconda Vice.

It was no doubt a five-star classic, but yet again  Jericho found himself on the losing end.  The night after Wrestlemania XXVIII on Monday Night Raw, Jericho finally gets the better of Punk, but only after CM Punk was thrashed during his countout loss to Mark Henry.  Jericho took advantage of a weakened Punk and poured alcohol all over him and broke a liquor bottle over his head.  But he still didn’t pin Punk’s shoulders to the mat or those of anybody else that’s currently a top-tier talent in the WWE locker room.  So, what are we left with to draw our conclusions?  Jericho definitely still has the stuff to put on a great show.  He still has the ability to compete on the highest level with anybody in the locker room.  He’s good enough to still be in the Main Event, but the conclusion we’re evidently supposed to draw from Jericho’s performance over the past three months is that he’s apparently just not good enough to win.